Bicycles and the Magic 8 Ball

We had a magical weekend riding bicycles, asking the Magic 8 Ball important questions and posing for pictures.  Our kids love to have their photo taken!

Vegas Strip

It’s 2 AM and I’m not real sleepy.  I’ve been sleeping off food poisoning for the past two days.

My friend Laurie has me hooked on Angry Birds on Facebook.  Laurie doesn’t know she started me on this version.  I think my sister Suz was the first to show me Angry Birds.  Thanks Suz,  I think.

While I’m playing, this show Vegas Strip is on tv.  It’s a reality show in Vegas following the police.  I am half paying attention.  I’ve been to Vegas several times with John and it is certainly an amazing city.

A police officer pulls over a truck that was driving slowly beside a woman, thinking hooker/jon.  She was actually the man’s wife and didn’t want to get in the truck with him because she was so pissed off.  He had lost $200 at a casino and she was irate and drunk.  I started to pay closer attention to the tv because it made me think of the time in Vegas that John lost $1000 in one hand of cards.  I was also irate, just not drunk.

The female officer was talking to the wife and told her she had a right to be mad at him.  The wife said, “My husband say, get in the truck, they think I’m hookering.”  The female officer giggled at that.

Next the wife said, “I know it’s not going to work with him.  I love him but I hate him.”  Wow, I could so relate to what this woman was saying.  The female officer asked why stay and she gave the classic answer, “for our kids.  Sixteen years with that man.”

There were no charges filed against wife and hubby.  The female officer looked genuinely concerned for the wife while the male officer encouraged her to kiss and make up with her husband.  The husband made his wife feel guilty and convinced her to give him a kiss and get in the truck.  As the couple drove away the male officer said, “They kissed and made up, a happy ending after all.”  The female officer looked at him like he was crazy.

Now, I can’t imagine being in a relationship with John anymore.  Why?  Because I loved him, but I didn’t like him.  How does that make sense?  I don’t know.

He just can’t guilt me anymore.


Facebook Mad Lib #2


His Majesty, the King

The year is 17, and Canada`s heart with Indonesia is History.
In his continued efforts to outdo the President of Indonesia, His Majesty, King Harry Potter VIII, has invited some of the country`s most creepy doctors to create for him a dresser fit for the most nude of all fire fighters: himself.
Unfortunately, His Majesty`s purple dogs are turning his once-funny kingdom into Canada`s sexiest pole dancer.  In an act of desperation, Queen Lady Gaga has convinced a silly Dutch police officer to beg her husband`s beloved country with a much-needed blanket.  Only three things stand in the way of this happening: the police officer`s easily offended lollipop; a pair of doctors who may not be who or what they seem; and the king himself.

Run all this news with some ugly and fiesty lagers in our The Scarlet Letter.

Facebook Mad Lib #1

Candle lit deer

Personal Ad Mad Lib Contributed by Dannielle Albert

              I enjoy long, sexy walks on the beach, getting landed in the rain and serendipitous encounters within hospitals. I really like piña coladas mixed with beer, and romantic, candle-lit deer . I am well-read from Dr. Seuss to Dale Earnhart. I travel frequently, especially to Argentina, when I am not busy with work. (I am a truck driver.)  I am looking for table and beauty in the form of a Hispanic goddess. She should have the physique of Sharon Stone and the nose of Tracy Meckley. I would prefer if she knew how to cook, clean, and wash my horses. I know I’m not very attractive in my picture, but it was taken 30 days ago, and I have since become more hairy.

Chill Preach!

I take comments on my blog without flinching.  Whether you are on Team Pattie, my classmate, part of my family, a friend, or my husband’s girlfriend I read what everyone writes.  I’ve never had my feelings hurt by comments.  Good or bad…I take, learn from them and move on.

There have been many “religious people” commenting on my blog about my faith and the dangers of creating a new religion.  I read your comments.  I let you preach.  It’s all cool.  I’ve managed to grow super thick skin.  A personal fact about me:  I have a very stong, undeniable belief in God.  Now today I noticed a pastor had posted on my Facebook “sick” under my Lady Gaga blog.  (

I asked her if she read the paper and she said yes.  I asked if she knew it was fiction and she didn’t care what it was in my world, to her it was “sick” and the rudeness of her answers followed by “Anything else?” prompted me to write:

Nope, nothing else.  I’m glad my Religions professor liked it.  Your rudeness makes me glad i don’t even know where your church is.

That comment on FB caused her to shoot me this private message:

Look, first off missy I don;t know why you even ever requested my friendship. I ignore all the weird things that you post and quite honestly I don’t mind just deleting you so goodbye. Oh and Patty… if I would ever have to put the book down for a minute I would.

Fine by me.

Amy deleted me immediately.  Now most of the preachers and religious folk realize it was a college final paper.  Some even complimented me on it.

Amy did not and now….she is gone.

I’m sorry I couldn’t save her.


M&M is the cover name

You are an intriging character.  I want you to be part of my story.  We met because of my website, completely at random.  Not in person, just chatting on Facebook now.

You know who you are. Others may think I am writing about them and they may be right or they May be wrong.

Welcome to my novel.

Message Me,



OK! Tell me already

Here's your chance for a preview

Here’s your chance.  What do you want me to write about?  Fiction (ToadLicker), non-fiction (Beaver Hole)… stories The Spartan stuff, divorce (ughh drama), kid story (Telsa stuff), embarrassing friend stories (Spanish, art, Weiners??  short-stories, adult stories/poems, my own bizarre twisted thoughts without proof reading?

You tell me and I will write.  Or send me a question to answer.  Or a “first line of a story”

Hit me…I’m feeling creative.  Will credit suggestions unless you want to be unknown.  Why is that?

I may regret this,



What to do…what to do?

Amusing the photographer, Tesla

I have a few days left of fall break before it’s back to classes.  My weekend flew by with Dale and Tesla.  Tesla and I spent a good portion of Friday painting.  I painted my sculpture for art class.  We had to do a figurative piece that had personal meaning.  I created a self-portrait and painted it to reflect emotion.  We did not paint my car again like we did this day when boredom struck….hard.  We spent the day with Aunt Suzie and Blaine.  Dale met us at Pinchot Park and we had a nice time.  I kept sticking Suz with Ying patrol.  He annoys her.  I laugh.

So today I have quite a list of things to accomplish:

1. Find Tesla’s dance leotard.  John already let me a message this morning because I didn’t send it Friday or this morning.  I don’t know what the heck Tesla did with the leotard or the t-shirt she had on when I picked her up from Heather.  That was the same night Heather refused to let Tesla keep her leopard stuffed animal in her bedroom at John’s.

2. This goes along with number one.  Put away all the clean laundry from the weekend.  I have 3-4 baskets of clothes.  I’ve lost count.  I only do laundry on the weekends to save on electric.  If it’s nice out, I even hang sum up to dry.  Dale thinks I’m crazy as he just drys everything.

3.  Work on my literature class presentation on “The Hellbound Heart” and the movie, Hellraiser, by Clive Barker.  I am trying to make a slideshow picture to accompany the selected portions of the book I will read aloud to class.  I love to do presentations and take front center stage…I mean class.

4. Spanish a presentation as Carl Brady with my daughters Marsha and Cindy.  Marsha is Kristin James  Cindy is Olivia Sederstrom.  We are having fun with this and I will eventually blog about our presentation.

5. Religion:  Cult writing.  Might blog it online.  Any suggestions out there on wtf I can write…I have many ideas:  Lady Gaga as a type of disciple.  A really wacky one with Illuminated symbols, Satanic symbols.  The “Text” in The Lady’s Guide Stones, located in GA.  At the Georgia Guide Stones are the text inscribed in many languages. I actually wrote about those long before I even knew I was enrolling in this NRMs class.

6.  Kitchen: put away clean dishes.  (Dale washes all the dishes.  That is so awesome because I hate getting my hands wet.)  Mop floor, clear of island, finishing clearing the table.

7.  Clear coffee table of school books.  vacuum.

8. Paint my second sculpture.  I haven’t named it yet.  Will post pictures of the process.

9.  Read Sunday’s paper.  Was so busy at Pinchot Park I didn’t get to read much of it.

10.  Blog about Pinchot Park yesterday and the chainsaw carving I took pictures of all weekend.  It’s located on Druck Valley Road.

Will attempt the whole list.

Tommorrows another day,


Dear Dale II~Update

Me N U

Dear Dale,

   Hi honey!  You are off working on someone’s computer and I am home goofing off on Facebook.  You know how much I love Facebook.  With Tesla at her dad’s house for the weekend, I had some time to think about what all is going on in my life. (and now on vacation with Heather and kidlings in Erie.  Tesla said they went to church.  Seriously, church.)

   You are an amazing man.  I enjoy your company so much and we never have a shortage of things to talk about.  The more I learn about your childhood and how you managed to survive a hit and run accident in the parking lot of a church in York, the more amazed I become.  You at one point were in a coma for 6 weeks, then woke up.  Unable to do anything yourself you care fell into the hands of your brother. 

  You survived and did what the doctors said you would never do; talk, walk, see, hear….live.  No one expected you to make it baby, especially the woman who gave birth to you.  Thank God for the people who did look out for you because your mother was worthless and took all the money you received, letting you with nothing.

   But you had something sweetheart that she couldn’t take from you and that is determination.  I like your determination in living.  Not just living, but enjoying life.  Taking each day and being grateful to have others in their life to share in times of joy and during times when things just suck.

Dale Hollinger, you work hard at helping people get their computers fixed.  Your customers are always satisfied.  If you have a COMPUTER need, contact Dale at jerks on Craigs list flag his ads everyday.  Maybe my blog will get around those assholes.  🙂  LOL

Dale is the man!

   Things are a bit off in my world and I know if affects your world too.  I think you are wonderful and I look forward to our relationship growing.  A new, healthy, loving relationship is what I want in life.  A man who has my trust and my back. 

My pc is down, can you take a house call?


Get ya coming and going

This afternoon a friend of mine, Butch Yater stopped by with the decals he made me for my car.  He did a great job as a favor to me.  If anyone needs detailing work done, give Butch a call!  (717-881-2234)






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