Amish Mafia’s Esther and Mirkat living in anything but harmony

After vicious beating, Amish Mafia’s Esther and boyfriend living together; police called twice – LancasterOnline: Local News.

I don’t believe in blaming the victim but I already said once that this man isn’t going to change. I’ve been in this situation and know, no matter how many times they say they are sorry, they won’t do it, or say it, or scream it again, they will.

Esther you are blocking the wrong person, unless you only block me because you don’t want to read or hear the truth.

1. Amish Mafia is fake.

2. Mirkat is abusive.

Why would you go back with a man who beat the shit out of your face? Why would you set that kind of an example to your children?

Get away from him before you’re dead. That’s the advice I was given when I was in a bad relationship, and I TOOK it.


The Amish Queen Esther and her Rapper Man

Esther has been flying low on the radar since her Twitter account was suspended.  Don’t worry, she started another!  (I’m officially blocked, though I did have a brief follow.)  Her maybe boyfriend, Mirkat also has me blocked but no worries, I have plenty of people who fill in the blank spaces.

On September 16th Mirkat celebrated Esther and her mom making him lunch. I would assume this means mom is okay with Esther’s fondness of the badass rapper.  The one that she recently pressed charges against for domestic violence.  Must be all smoothed over now.

  1. Mirkat ‏@TheRealMirkat 16 Sep

Esther and her mom made me lunch how sweet!

Today this was sent to me through Facebook.  Again, I’m assuming the gentleman Esther was with at Park City, was again, the rapper that tweets about her.


See, this assures me that Esther and Levi won’t be hooking up on the show.  Well, I mean they might hook-up on the show, but it’s all fake.  But we know it’s all fake now, right?  I can’t help but wonder….what does Levi’s REAL girlfriend think of all this love acting?

Can’t wait for Season 3!

Stayed tuned, especially during the off-season!  I always have info flowing.


Can’t Get Enough? More Amish Mafia

Amish Mafia: Esther Schmucker Opened Multiple Abuse Cases Against Boyfriend This Summer

So I’m guessing this isn’t the man the Old Amish Sect lady was talking about when she told Esther she needed to find a good man.  Personally, I think it’s all promotional but hey, whatever.  Filing a PFA and then not showing up for court is a no-no.  It makes it harder for women who are really being abused to get a PFA because of drama like this.

Can any of this make it onto the program please? ~P.

Amish Mafia: Esther Schmucker Opened Multiple Abuse Cases Against Boyfriend This Summer.


Amish Esther Co-Signs


Have you indulged in the Discovery’s Channels “reality tv” series Amish Mafia yet?  If not, what the heck are you waiting for?  This show has a little bit of everything for everyone.  Unless you’re actually Amish, then you shouldn’t be watching.

The program is full of contradictions about how the Old Amish Sect functions.  Obviously none of the characters are truly Amish or they wouldn’t be on the program.  Also, the main characters use cellphones, drive, and other no-nos.  All that aside, the blend of scripted programming along with the “slices of life” that are genuine-they’re aren’t faking getting arrested- the whole program is just cray-cray.

Esther, who has blocked me on Twitter, is apparently doing well for herself with this series.  This isn’t her first rodeo–or maybe, sewing circle.  I’m told she is doing well enough to co-sign for her ex-boyfriend to buy a new car back in July.  Mirkat and Esther are not a couple, but apparently still close enough that she would co-sign for him.  Strange, since not that long ago, she said he was abusing her physically.  Oh the Amish drama!  I thought the pair made a striking couple.  The song “Ebony and Ivory” just popped into my head.  Esther likes her meat dark, ya know? (A reader pointed out that this sounded extremely racist. Just to clarify, Esther tweeted she likes her meat dark. I can’t access her account anymore but, trust me, she did.)

Another thing that interests me: Esther claims the Amish pay just as much taxes as the “English” to the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania and government.  That kick-up a bit of a shit storm online as most people disagree.  What about sales tax on vehicle purchases?  Just kidding, I’m sure Mirkat paid for all that.

The scenes in Amish Mafia are priceless, you don’t know if you should laugh, cry or get pissed off.  At times, I do all three.

Will Freeman speak?  Will Esther give up sewing circles?  Will Levi ever fall for scripted love again?  Will Jolin take his shirt off soon? Will Merlin pull a shoo-fly pie out of his ass?

Time will tell.


More Amish Mafia:

Esther gets to use an oven

The casual Esther

The casual Esther

Esther is taking a break from the Amish world and enjoying her time with her boyfriend at his digs.  Mirkat, her boyfriend once again, is enjoying Esther’s breakfast cooking abilities.  “I love watching her cook” he tweeted.  (Bet she is loving cooking with gas.  Woot Woot!)  Not that we need reminded but Mirkat also tweeted, “The Amish manage without electricity all the time.”

I totally get his fascination with watching Esther cook.  The way to a man’s heart is food and I’m thinking Esther should have no problem keeping Mirkat happy.  I wonder if he will teach her how to cook some new dishes.  There is something to be said for a man who can hold his own in the kitchen.

Keeping it hot in the kitchen girlfriend

Keeping it hot in the kitchen girlfriend

All that gas oven use must make the kitchen warm.  Esther that little piece of skin between your hot shorts and #5 t-shirt, is that a tattoo?  That would be a super naughty girl move, so now I’m REALLY curious….

Well, after that all out Twitter war, I’m glad to see things have settled down.  If things continue to go well, can we hope to see Mirkat joining in the mafia?  Perhaps a new bad ass dude to give Levi a run for his money and green corn?

All I can say is…MAKE IT HAPPEN!


Amish Mafia: Here’s the truth

What ya gonna do when they come for you?

What ya gonna do when they come for you?

Discovery Channel you had a good idea here with this Amish Mafia show.  It is a show that tells a story about some events that may or may not have really happened in Lancaster, PA and a bit in Ohio.  It tries to be a reality show, but it is not.

If it were a reality show we would see Esther Schmucker and Levi Stoltzfus learning they will be traveling to FL for a spontaneous vacation.  Esther knew they were going to FL, and that “Oh that’s just creepy” line was just good acting on her part.  She’s not an actress.  But she would like to be.  Esther would also like to be a model.  Her boyfriend (though they seem to have broken up) was a black rapper that goes by The Real Mirkat who smokes bongs in his videos.  He has nothing bad to say about Esther and considers her a wonderful person.  I haven’t spoke to Esther in over a week, but I wonder if she says the same.

Then there is Allen Bieler, a local repeat in the news.  He loves running from the cops.  Probably because of that weed, pills, etc. that was in the car.  He is listed as a paid actor on the set of Amish Mafia.  He has worked for them in the past in recording Amish stories.  Yes, he did get adopted and did live in Lancaster.  He currently lives in Lancaster, out free without bail.  Amazing, a “mafia member” out of jail and no need for bail.  Mafia my ass.

And Levi Stoltzfus, the Mafia Boss.  The only thing Levi is boss of is his deck and siding business.  His business has been around for a long time but only last year joined the Better Business Bureau.  I’m sure to look as legit as possible now that he would be on television as the Boss of Lancaster County.  Did I mention Levi is a cousin of one of the girls from Breaking Amish?  Levi if you’re the boss how about finding out where the Amish puppy mills are and doing something about it?  Or what about the horses sold off for slaughter at auction?  Oh wait Levi, you are guilty of doing just that.  Is the head of the Amish Mafia really that broke he has to take his horses to auction and not donate them to an horse rescue?  People don’t want to hear about Levi sending his horses get whacked and making some cash too.

Twitter Wars could be another show for TLC oops, Discovery Channel.  (Esther worked for TLC on their series Breaking Amish.  TLC and DC are produced by the same company)  Esther was on Twitter but has since decided it’s just insane.  Levi Stoltzfus account has been suspended…don’t know who suspended.  There are other “characters” that may or may not be on Twitter making disgusting comments.  I wonder if Levi is regretting taking the part of Boss Man.  So much drama for just an Amish man….well, for a non-Amish man.

So it’s fake.  FAKE….fake….yep fake.  Come on, you already knew it.  I won’t twist the knife but: IT’S FAKE!!  The “cast” of Amish locals are no longer friends.  It is strictly business for them.  Can you imagine having to work with Merlin?  Some nutbag they found in Ohio to be Levi’s rival.  At least they don’t have to fake hate and contempt.  No acting required for that.

Thank God it is fake because Lancaster County doesn’t need Robin Hood like characters brandishing semi-automatic weapons.  And where the heck did they find Jolin, the finest maybe Mennonite, now maybe living in the area.  At least til this roller-coaster ride comes to an end.  Now that a local business that gives tours of the Amish area has decided to add a tour of filming locations, the show could become even more popular.  Perhaps it won’t matter if it’s fake.  If it brings business to Amish community, that will be a plus.

Just admit there is no mafia in Lancaster.  And this show and supposed mafia people have nothing to do with the horrible shootings at Nickels Mine School, and I’ll be happy.  Otherwise, I’m coming to find out.  That reporter in Hollywood won’t be coming, but I can….and will.

Hunting down the mafia,


P.S. This makes for great creative nonfiction.  I’m going to ace this class and term.

UPDATE: 6/15/2013

I used the Amish Mafia as the thesis of my Religious Secrets and Conspiracy final paper.

Click these links to read the results of my deeper delve into the Amish Mafia.

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