Reminds Me of Dirty Cotton

Ying and I are home chilling on the couch; I have a spiced rum and coke, he has a strange smell to himself that he wishes to share with my legs and butt, nearly curled in a circle, chin resting on my right foot. This is a big no-no, but I let him snuggle when Brian’s not home. Shhh, don’t tell.

I am watching Access Hollywood for no particular reason. Katy Perry is on. Tesla loves Katy Perry. Those costumes from her tour are amazing.

Wow, Bruce Jenner is really changing his looks.  I’ve never seen his show. I bet that’s crazy stuff.

Speaking of crazy, activity on my blog has been crazy, especially yesterday. The Amish Mafia post kicked up a storm. Not as big as Lady Gaga creating her own religion. I’m not sure where balloons fall for popular posts. Don’t mind me. My brain wanders, but does return.

Today was less busy with visits, as the regular followers of Amish Mafia already read it. They’re usually one-shot readers. Instead, today it got specific as comments mounted and defenses on both ends went up. I have no idea if the Amish Mafia people read my regular, usually rather boring, life posts. (I have no idea who reads my blog unless you like or comment) I am the middle of the tug-of-war between one woman, with a supposed load of emails from the lead character, where they have a love affair online. The other end of the rope is another woman involved with a character on the show. Seriously, it could be an episode on the show, except it’s real life.

Moving on, the York Mayor was in a commercial about helping homeless children in York. I met Mayor Bracey at a function for the Youth Center.   We talked quite a bit and she knew Brian well. Brian’s considering a career change.  She would make a great reference.  I think she’s doing a good job. Of course, I don’t walk down West Jackson Street after dark either.

Ying moved to the other end of the couch. I guess my ass and legs weren’t comfortable enough. He needs his hair trimmed. The fuzz on his butt is getting out of control, like squirrels fought a battle there. It reminds me of dirty cotton.

dirty sheep

Thirty minutes till my man is home.


Anniversary and Amish Mafia

In two days Brian and I will celebrate our first anniversary.  I haven’t written much about my personal life because, wait for it, wait . . . my life has been kinda dull. Actually, that’s a lie, my life has been really interesting, but I can’t really write about it. It involves too many people.

So, two days until the day Brian tells me he and his wife are split up. Two days until Dale reads my instant messages and realizes I lied to him for the first time. It was a lie by omission. I was going where I was going, just not to see who I said.

Breakups are bad, especially for me. Guys don’t seem to like being broken up with. The only one who took it like a man was my first husband. I grow on people, I suppose.

A year of getting to know Brian, it’s been amazing. He is such a sweet, kind, generous man. Extremely patient and gifted with the ability to nearly block out every sound kids make and pile of clutter he encounters. And of course, he’s incredibly easy on my eyes. I could stare out him for an hour and not get tired of looking. By the end of the day I cannot wait to lay my eyes on him.

We are extremely happy. Tesla is extremely happy. She gets every other week with Brian and I, and the other week she is with her dad and his fiancée, Gina. I like Gina even if I think her judgement in men is clouded. Haha. She reminds me of me when I met John, just older and blonde. Gina used to work with my sister, Suz, at Memorial Hospital and interesting enough, Gina, Suz, Brian, and I all attend LCBC Church on N. Hills Street in York.

God has really touched my life in the past year. I’ve always been very open with my faith in God. He’s saved my life here on earth, and I know when my life on earth ends, he will save me again to join him in Heaven.  He got me through tough times with going through divorce, college, struggling financially and in suing for joint custody. I held my faith and everything came out right. I fell in love, got a divorce, graduated college, started a new career, won joint custody of Tesla, and found a church that feels right in my life.

A year has flown by and so much has happened since Brian and I reacquainted and basically changed our lives overnight. Every day I want to pinch myself because I swear I must been dreaming. He is the best. I want to be his wife.

It’s also been a year since a friend of mine told me she had been diagnosed with lung cancer. She doesn’t think she has much time left. I stopped to see her. . . I feel like shit for not going before. Now, she is busy with so many people wanting to see her, and I understand.

I’ve starting writing a book about a haunted house by the Susquehanna River. No title idea so far.

I can’t wait for Amish Mafia to start. Just saying. Sadly it won’t premiere won’t be until the end of January. I’ve heard Esther is or was pregnant, my guess, to Mirkat. Not that long ago she was supposed to be Amish. And Levi seems to be a mess, all worried about some nudies getting out. Does anyone want to see Levi naked?

Just wondering.


Confessions of a Bully

I love writing on my blog.  It’s a place share my thoughts, publish what I write in my college classes, bitch about my endless divorce, make new friends….the list goes on and on.

I’ve recently been called a bully by some readers and by another blog writer.  I don’t see myself as a bully, but I know bullies never think they are bullies.  So perhaps, I am a bully.


I’m many things, but not a bully.

1.  mommy

2.  girlfriend

3. wife (ready to lose that title)

4. pet owner

5. stop reading this stupid shit.

Hells yeah, I can be a bully.  Now if someone gets in my face, I’ll give it right back.

I was bullied in school but didn’t have the backbone to stand up for myself.

I was bullied by my father but was respectful as a child and held my tongue.  (That is out the window now)

I was bullied by my husband and actually began to think maybe I was a bad person, a shitty mother, a terrible wife, lazy, stupid….

My advice is not to mess with me, my kids, my family, my friends, my boyfriend or my dog.  That will automatically bring out the bully in me.

Yes, I learned how to box, but I don’t depend on those skills to get me through life.  I depend on my witty sarcasm and thick skin.  Name calling is silly but if I’m going to be called anything, it’s not Bully.

Scintillating Damsel has a nice ring to it.


Narcissist~Fiona and Ken knew

Everyone is going to look at the title of this post and say “who knew?” but that’s okay.  Fiona and Ken know who they are and that’s all that matters.

Once, a long time ago when I still lived in my house, someone much younger than me stated “He is a narcissist.”  I agreed, knowing in general what a narcissist was.

Today, a fellow blogger made the same comment about another blogger but she added the definition of narcissistic personality.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder:
Symptoms of this disorder may include, but are not limited to:
Reacting to criticism with anger, shame, or humiliation
Taking advantage of others to reach their own goals
Exaggerating their own importance, achievements, and talents
Imagining unrealistic fantasies of success, beauty, power, intelligence, or romance
Requiring constant attention and positive reinforcement from others
Easily becoming jealous
Lacking empathy and disregarding the feelings of others
Being obsessed with oneself
Mainly pursuing selfish goals
Trouble keeping healthy relationships
Easily becoming hurt and rejected
Setting goals that are unrealistic
Wanting “the best” of everything
Appearing unemotional

Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. Those with narcissistic personality disorder believe that they’re superior to others and have little regard for other people’s feelings. But behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem, vulnerable to the slightest criticism.

After reading Fiona’s comment about another blogger it took me back to the day Ken said the same about John.

They were both right.



For record, anything I write in my blog is told in my words.  I’m not lying about anything and my memories are the best that I can recall.

Having said that, I find the bullshit I’m getting from a certain family has gotten out of control.  Especially considering I never said anyone in that family DID something wrong.

What went from a blog to encourage people to report being attack or to help someone who is being attacked has turned into a personal attack on me.  Threats of court, telling about my childhood, etc. is ridiculous.  No district attorney in their right mind would try to prosecute someone for their writings in a blog.  Especially since we are all nobodies.

I don’t have jack shit to be sued for and the threat of it does nothing.  To make those who want to believe I’m lying, I have taken out names but in NO WAY does that mean what I wrote wasn’t true.  The ruckus being raised just brings more attention to that family all on their own.  Perhaps a phone call to discuss it or arrange to meet would have been a better way to approach it since calling me a liar hasn’t done anything positive for anyone.

Also, the person in question hasn’t had a peep to say.  Odd since everyone else is so quick to claim I threw his name in just to slander him.



I saw it on the back of a car

Someone sent me a message saying they saw my blogsite on a bumper sticker.  Cool!

My blog is so diverse I pick up readers from all over the world.  They don’t know me from the Man in the Moon.

I was asked in court why I blog.  I blog because I started it for school.  My personal life became a category.  So I started blogging for school and began writing about my life.  I believe I write about so many things, how can my blog about my life be such an issue?

Is it really that big a deal to write about my life?  Is it any different from having to go to court and testify about the exact same thing….my life with John?



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