Dear Everyone

Hello Everyone! I like this Breast Cancer Awareness picture.

You may know me personally, be a relative or a friend.  If you know me, that’s awesome!  If not, My parents are Walt and Dolores Crider.  I went to Dover School District K-12 years and married Gary Bonawitz.  Gary and I have 2 sons, Jarrid who is 19 and Zeth, almost 18.  Gary and I have been divorced since 1998, but we are still friends.

Along came Sharon Schwimer into my life.  We became a domestic couple for about two and a half years, then remained friends after the break up.  Sharon (or as I call her Shar) and I had some roughs times, but she is a true friend.

In 2004, by a strange twist of fate, I met John Delauter at Blockbuster video in Dallastown.  We quickly became a couple, he divorced his wife Diane Delauter, now Gieda and I moved in.  A month later, I sold my house.  Three months later, I quit my job with the State and we immediately began to legalize his handyman business into an established moving service.  We were married the day after his divorce was posted in the newspaper.  We had many family members on both sides and I really thought life was going to rock.

It didn’t.  In fact, it’s just been rocky since the day we met.  I am happy to have met John’s friends and family.   Everyone in my life that I am still in touch with is wonderful.  The exception would be John’s brother Mike.  He’s a real ass clown.  (One of his favorite sayings)

My blog is open to anyone who wants to read it.  Comments welcome, even if you don’t want to say who you are.  Please read my other stories….I know the one about my life is the most entertaining, but I am a student.  I need constructive criticism on my writings from other categories than divorce.  Hahahahaha!

More weird, funny and shocking blogs to come!  Thanks for reading!

OXOX,

~P.

Off to class

Just had breakfast with Tesla and chatted about what we want to do tomorrow.  She requested the “big rooster” puzzle and I instantly knew she meant Big Bird puzzle, the character from Sesame Street.  Second on her list is brownies that she picked out at the grocery store.  Tesla picked out the really expensive ones and that’s fine by me. 

That was about it on her list.  My list included going through all her toys and organizing her room.  I told her we would make piles of her toys to keep, throw away and donate.  She smiled and asked, “Can we jump over them?”  🙂  She’s soo funny! 

We discussed her hair-length and she informed me she wants to grow it long, like Mommy’s.  She only wants LaDonna to cut her bangs. 

Ok, Tess just brought Ying up from the garage.  I gotta get to class, and put Ying back in the garage.  He ate an entire ear of corn minus some cob.  Hard to say what his digestive track may be like. 

Math here I come,

~P.

Test

This colorblind test has nothing to do with my blog. Hopefully you see the number 3 there.

Text.  Test.  Test.

What the hell is that all about?  I have a math test due, but not until Monday.  So I’m not actually panicking, just reminding myself I should do it now.  I just finished writing my husband a letter (http://girlboxer1970.com/2011/07/21/dear-john-iv/ ) and should work on my math so I have all weekend to myself with Tesla.  But first, I want to write about something.

Sitting in my bedroom with my “new to me” air conditioner, I want to share a few thoughts while I wait for the gas man to arrive and give me gas.  Yes, it’s been a week since I moved in here and the gas man will finally cometh.

I marvel at the Commonwealth of PA’s welfare program.  While PA isn’t a state it’s often referred to as a State or PA State.  Regardless, there is a welfare system that can easily trap people into giving up in life, just letting the State pay their way.  By taking the time to learn how to use the State assistance program, I have made use of numerous benefits.

The Commonwealth of PA’s assistance program can work for someone who is having some bad luck in life.  My benefits are substantial, including medical insurance, mental health assistance with therapy for depression, dental, tuition money, grants, scholarships, loans, a car purchase, reimbursement of mileage, payment of textbooks and probably even more.  Not all just for me, but Tesla too.  The State will cover my daughter’s allergy tests at Hershey Medical Center because I am one of those people who have fallen on hard times.  My life is a wreck and seems stuck in a rut.

I did notice on the PA child custody website that John could be held accountable for all costs the State covers that they feel he should be attempting, instead of cancelling the little insurance policy Tesla and I did have.  Wouldn’t that be something if he has to reimburse the State?

Life is a test.  An endurance test.  Take it one day at a time.  🙂

Enduring life a little cooler,

~P.

Math, M&Ms and more

How to calculate in chocolate

Done!  Done!  Done!

Just finished up my math homework.  My professor lent me his extra calculator this afternoon.  How kind is that?!  I had one that someone else had bought me, but that one wasn’t “scientific” enough to handle these advanced math problems.  I decided to use M&Ms to calculate but that didn’t last long.  Too Tempting!

A friend brought me the M&M’s yesterday, the ones with pretzels inside.  They are pretty damn good.  On a completely different note,  I’m currently experiencing gas problems. (Not to be confused with the gas on the first day I blogged at http://girlboxer1970.com/2011/01/21/its-just-gas-it-to-will-pass/ )  Columbia Gas was called on Thursday about my gas needs.  What do they say?  They can have it hooked up in a week.  A week?

It has been less than 3 days since I moved here and I am over the cold showers and stove that just won’t light.  It is hot out, but straight cold showers over the past 3 days SUCKS!  My entire body gets covered in goosebumps and I try to not bite myself as I shiver.  Forget about shaving!  I could die a slow death from all the nick marks on my legs!

Just half an hour and I leave to get Tesla.  I miss her so much!  Of course there’s always that feeling I get when I have to drive to my old house to pick her up. (http://girlboxer1970.com/2011/03/30/that-sinking-feeling/ )  Tesla is worth driving to my old home, talking to John, talking to John’s girlfriend, rarely seeing my dog I couldn’t take, Vic.

Everything I do is to improve my life for my daughter’s sake.

TT time soon!

~P.

Took one for the team

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Tomorrow will be my last Recreational Shooting class at York College.  I have to be honest and say I will miss that single credit class.  My classmates were awesome and Professor Massa is a very cool teacher.  I learned a few new things in rec shooting.  One being it is NOT a requirement to have a gun in one hand and a beer in the other.  Imagine that!?

In rifle shooting I received a 3.5 out of 4 and pistol shooting the same.  Clay birds was my favorite and I would have loved to practice more with the shotgun.  Even without practice I managed to get 5 out of 5 the first day.  Hell, I was hoping to at least get 3!

Professor Massa was quite entertaining in class.  He had many stories about shooting to share and even took a shot in the leg during pistol practice.  Good thing the school has medical coverage and workers comp!  His luck is not good with animals though.  Without shooting them, cats die off in his presence.  Take his class if you want to learn more!

The slideshow is from class today.  Notice in the one picture where I am “throwing the pigeons,” I take a shell in the back.  My friend Josh just happened to catch that on film.

Thumbs up to York College for offering such an educational gym class.  It beats the hell out of yoga.

Taking no prisoners,

~P.

bike down

I made a BAD decision today.  Probably not the only bad decision, but this one was a doozy.

I rode my harley to classes today, enjoying the nice weather.  I decided to park as close to the humanities building as possible.  Crossing over the tiny stream, my cycle was swept down by the water and it was so slimy standing on the concrete crossway, I couldn’t pick up my bike.  Finally I had some volunteers who didn’t mind wet feet.

As if Spanish isn’t bad enough, two hours of it soaking wet with nasty smelling creek water took the prize.  Life is interesting.

~P.   (who has showered and washed her smelly clothes)

Mi rutina (My routine)

My second Spanish composition….

En la mañana yo quiero ir el parque y jugar el béisbol con me hija.  Nos
gusta escuchar a las gritas de los niños mientras ellos juegan el béisbol.  Yo paso mucho tiempo con me hija en la pincina.  Nosotras preferimos nadar en agua
el fresco.  Me hijo trabaja a la pincina y nosotras vamos para ver a ello.

En la tarde, vamos a pasear y compartimos la conversacion.  Nosotras
comemos el helado en el verano.  Yo prefiero el chocolate y ella prefierie la frutilla.  Espero viajar a la playa y tomar el sol.

En la noche yo tengo muchas responsabilidades en la casa.  Yo tengo qué preparar la cena por las familias.  Ellos tienen mucho hambre por el bistec y la langosta.  Nosotros desamos
comer la comida deliciosa.  Después de la cena yo limpio la cocina.  Me familia
mira la television.  Yo prefiero la lectura en el noche.

Mis muchachas van a las montañas conmigo.    Nosotras llegamos en la tarde.  Ellas preparan ir de excursion.  Las montañas son cerca del río.  Nosotras encuentramos las piedras bonitas.  Mi hijo, Jarrid es muy tonto.  Él tiene mucho miedo  el pez.
Jarrid no le gustan las pecas.

Mi pasatiempo favorito es ser con mi familia.  Yo tengo dos bueno hijos y
una inteligente hija.  Yo escribo electrónico por Jarrid y Zeth a leer.
Nosotros también hablamos por el teléfono celular.   Ellos gusta habla con Tesla todos los días.

~P

Under a rock in Spain

Calpe rock~Calpe, Spain

I haven’t been blogging lately as Spanish is taking up all my time.  Ifeel like I’m living under a rock!  Two hours in class from Mon-Thurs and Spanish tutoring two hours in the afternoon or evening depending on schedules.  Also consuming my time is my visits to my darling friend Kristin.  She started learning Spanish in 7th grade through college.  God Blessed this woman with patience, as I torture her in my ignorance.

There has been several break throughs since I began taking Summer Spanish.  I was tempted to drop it, but I’ve decided to stick it out and throw my heart into it.  I’ve even started talking to Tesla in Spanish because talking to a 5 year old is so much easier!  My ego was a bit crushed when I was counting cookies on the kid’s napkins at Tesla’s daycare.  A little boy named Sherrod heard me miss a number and was quick to correct me.  I started to giggle, then all the kids began giggling and next thing I know the little girl to Tesla’s right announced she was made of trees.  Sherrod chimed in next being made of cheeseburgers followed by a little boy who was made of dinosaurs.  Tesla giggled along but didn’t announce what she was made of.  I was tempted to announce I was made of macaroni and cheese, but snack time was winding down and Tesla and I were ready to leave the tiny table with tiny chairs.

Back to Spanish, we had an oral exam on Tuesday.  I was nervous but decided if I screwed up, how bad could it be?  I spoke with a partner asking him where he was from, how old his father was, where he works, if he had a girlfriend and what was his favorite beer.  The prof. and classmates found that amusing.  Even more amusing was the professor telling us when everyone was done that 4 people mispronounce anos and gave their ages in anus.  Easy, but embarrassing one to screw up.  I, Thank God, did not announce I have 40 anuses.

We received our grades today for the oral exam in class.  I received a 36/40.  Considering my test scores have been in the 60’s I was happy.  Tonight I had a break-through in ar and ir verbs congigating.  Felt so good that I called it a night, took a shower and decided to blog because I was seriously tempted to pick up my Spanish book and see what else I can teach an old dog.  Speaking of dogs…my room mate John has an eleven year old son.  Their dog ran off and never came back.  She was old and I’m guessing was ready to call it a good life.  To replace Lola, Mattchew (my nickname for him) picked out a kitten through a friend of a friend of mine…The kitten is cute and very friendly.  We were throwing out names ideas and two of mine became top choices (after John and I convinced Mattchew that Bob wasn’t a cool name for a kitten.  My suggestion that stuck was Nytro….the one that almost made first choice….Taco.

~P.

PS-John told me in Hawaii, taco means octopus.  Now that’s weird!

 

Spanglish 101

A book I probably can't read yet

First, I want to apologize for how butchered this paper is if you are fluent in Spanish.  This is my first Spanish course with no previous high school class and first attempt at writing more than two sentences…that have to make sense.  I have no clue how to make accent marks while writing in Spanish….or upside down !….or upside down ?  Help!  Ayudar!

Spanish 101

 

                Hola, me llama Pattie Crider.  Yo soy estudiente
y detras de me companeros en aprender Española.  Me no gustan malas notas.  Ojala que te mas experiencia en Espanola!    Yo disfrutar la estudia de toda lengua. Me gusta leer y escritar cuentos para megusto.  Yo preferir cuentos en Ingles!

                Me gusta relajarse y comer galletas y bebida leche.
Yo no gusta leche en me el libro.  Me gusta fotofrafia me poca chica.
La llama es Tesla y no despues de musical banda.  Me gusta musical banda de me juvetud en la diecinueve ochentas.

                Tesla y yo disfrutar bailar y cantar.  Me quere Tesla muchisimo!  Ella es de sol luz de mi vida.  Nos no gusta alguien despertarse temprado de la manana.  Estamos cansada
de la manana!  Nos gusta a dormir hasta nueve de la manana y arreglar desayunar juntas.

                El primera comida de dia importante, mi madre dicha.  Nos comer desayuno todos los dias que fins en i griega.  Comer una dieta equilibrada muy importante a nos.

 WHAT I WAS TRYING TO SAY…..

         Hello, my name is Pattie Crider.  I am a student
and behind my classmates in learning Spanish.
I do not like bad grades.  I wish that I had more experience with Spanish!
I enjoy the study of any language. I like to read and write short stories for my pleasure.  I prefer short stories in English!

I like to relax and eat cookies and drink milk.
I don’t like milk in my book.  I like photographing my little girl.  Her
name is Tesla and not after the music band. I like music bands from my youth in the 1980’s.

Tesla and I enjoy singing and dancing.  I love
Tesla so much!  She is the sun light in my life.  We don’t like anyone waking us
early in the morning.  We are tired in the morning!  We like to sleep until 9 AM
and then fix breakfast together.

The most important meal of the day, my mother said.
We eat breakfast on every day that ends in y.  Eating a healthy diet is very important to
us.

OK, IT’S A WORK IN PROGRESS.  THIS BEING THE ROUGH DRAFT.  SUMMER SPANISH 101 IS TAUGHT AT A BRUTAL SPEED.

Two months at Four days a week for Two hours a day.  Whew!

~P.

The Golden Ass

Sex with animals….now that is a taboo.  There are reports of people having intercourse with animals in the news on a fairly regular basis.  I read that Craigslist is used to find a specific type of animal.  Dogs, sheep, horses….I wonder if you can request certain breeds.  Oh, wait…those people on Craigslist were arrested.  Bestiality is not a new taboo as humans have always had animals and eventually domesticated pets in their home.  It is often misspelled as “beastiality” as I did,  and my spell-checker quickly corrected me.  Those practicing this are referred to as Zoophilia, and there all kinds of levels to determine if you are a Zoophile.

Here is a little bit of bestiality from centuries ago.

Women in the Roman Empire basically held two roles through out the story, “The Golden Ass”.  Based on the novel, their role was a wife or slave and  to be subservient to all men.  The wives were also treated as slaves by their husbands.

Taking each of these two roles in the story, it will be clear how unappealing it was to be a woman in the Roman Empire.  A man named  Milo had a wife who’s name was Pamphile and they owned a slave, Photis.   While the wife had power over Photis, she was still regarded as a slave to her husband.  When Lucius joined them in their dining area, Milo waved his wife off their couch to his feet and Lucius took her place.  Pamphile does not become upset or angry,  she knows she must obey her husbands wishes.  Lucius had no hesitation in taking her seat because men were considered above women.  ( 15)

While lodging with Milo, Lucius can’t pass up the opportunity to have wild sex with Pamphile’s slave, Photis. (28)  As a slave, Photis was just an object to her owners.  Being a guest of Milo, Lucius freely takes advantage of Photis for his sexual pleasures.  Photis and slaves of this time period did the general housework.  Photis was also  ordered to assist in setting Lucius up for the Festival of Laughter (47) and sent to acquired items for potions, such as hair. (49)  Anything their master or his wife requested was expected to be carried out.

Wives and mothers were expected to uphold the family.  In “The Golden Ass” they fail terribly.  Instead of holding bonds with their husbands and children they ruthlessly look out for only themselves.  A wife who falls in love with her step-son and is jilted by him is portrayed as a murderer. (191)   A baker’s wife was said to be ugly, evil, and blasphemous.  She ignored her husband and spoke back to him often.  She had an affair and basically threw it in his face.  A good wife honors her husband and would never be involved in an affair.  Cast out from her role as wife, she takes the step of murdering her husband then fleeing. (182) 

During his travels, Lucius, over hears conversations and stories with his large donkey ears.  One story, told by an old hag in cahoots with thieves is, “Cupid and Psyche”.  The hag is telling a tale to console a kidnapped girl who is being held for ransom.   The girl is from an upper class family and the thieves hope to make a fortune in receiving a reward.  (72)  The girl was treated as a slave and meant nothing to her kidnappers other then money.  She was from a good family and about to marry an upstanding man. She even showed kindness and showed grace to the hag!

In the hags story, Psyche is a young girl who begins receiving attention and followers due to her amazing beauty.  She is married to the son of a goddess and has everything she wants in life, including a baby on the way.  Her two sisters are married and hate their husbands.  In anger and jealousy of Psyche’s life they use their slaves to help them plan to assassinate their innocent sister.   (86) 

Lucius, the ass, is introduced to an upper class woman who is well-known and respected in the area.  This responsibility to hold a superior role is crushed when one learns, she just wants to screw the jackass.  Holding the role of upper class does have some advantage, as they could not force her to perform a live donkey show. (207-208) This woman at one point became pregnant and delivered a daughter.  Though instructed to kill the baby, she tries to respect her husband’s wishes and passes her child onto another family.  Unfortunately, the wife of this family was certain the new daughter was after her husband.  Now out of jealousy, she murderers her adopted daughter in a gruesome fashion, only to learn, the hated child truly was her husband’s sister.  Though the wives try to serve their husbands in some aspects, in the novel they are portrayed as wicked and unfaithful spouses. (165,176,181,191) 

Back to the donkey show, the human owner of Lucius was greedy and enjoyed making money off his donkey.  The entire community was seeking out a suitable person to perform with Lucius.  That lucky girl was a condemned woman, who otherwise would just have been killed.  She was found guilty of being a murdering whore by a jury of her peers.  Ironically, Lucius who had no issue with bestiality before, suddenly doesn’t want to perform with this wicked woman.  In his eyes, he is still above this female prisoner, who is being forced to perform sexual acts with a donkey. (216) 

While the novel did have a few good woman characters the majority were bad.  They practiced witchcraft, did not honor their husbands or attend to their children properly.   The female characters that were shown as good were goddesses.    Each step in a characters life was somehow guided by such goddesses as Lady Fortune and Good Faith.  The lesser goddesses pale in comparison to Queen Isis.  This motherly goddess answers the prayers of a jackass!   She was kind and lent her ear to hear of his journeys, trapped in the body of an ass.  She shows favor to Lucius by transforming him back to human form during a parade. (235)   With his transgressions forgiven, he becomes a cherished member of professional society and devotes his life to worshiping his Queen Isis.

Through out this story of an ass, the women are always treated as lower class, even lower than a donkey.   The women fail their roles as wives or mothers.  The story is outrageous, but given the treatment of women in that time period, it is believable.  Men did not cherish their wives or slaves.  Any female was subject to use by men for their sexual needs.  A daughter’s could be cast into the trash with no feeling.  If found to be an adulteress, a woman would be tortured and killed.   Men would find another wife, or pay for a new one.  The only promising female role in the Roman Empire found in this story was that of a goddess.  If you weren’t a goddess, you were basically just some man’s bitch.

Apuleius, Lucius; Graves, Robert (Trans.) (1950). The Golden Ass. Penguin Classics, Penguin Books Ltd. ISBN 0-374-53181-1

B+

~P.

05/22/13 Update:  There must be daily searches for donkey show…and Google sends them to this post.  Funny huh?

…well, if you were looking for donkey sex shows, here are some interesting photos…

donkey1 Donkey-show-image mexican-donkey-show