You are here: Home / shut my mouth and write
Feb 21, 2012

Dear Heather~OMG!

By · 4 Comments

Come on out and chat!

Dear Heather,

Guess who popped up in my life?  Give up?  A skeleton of yours has come out of the closet and wow, I am in shock.

So much more makes sense to me now.  Things that were a mystery have been solved, and it’s not pretty.  Not pretty at all.

As far as I’m concerned you don’t deserve to be in my daughter’s life.  I wonder how much of your past you were honest about with my husband.  I can only imagine how that conversation went.

Heather:  I cheated on my husband.

John:  I cheated on my wife.

Heather:  I own a home with my husband.

John:  I own one with my wife.

Heather:  I have four children.

John:  I have one, but would love four more.

Heather:  I am still married.

John:  I am still married!

In unison: OMG!! We are perfect for each other!

How much does John know about your past?  He does like to think of himself as the “saver of women” so maybe that was part of the appeal.  He might even go as far as to think he is the “Savior of Women” in his mind.

You might not have a record Heather, but you do have skeletons in your closet.  I think I have been giving you credit you don’t deserve.  You and John could compete for the number of skeletons you have in the closets.

There are many closets to come out of.

Creeeeeeeeeeeek,

~P.

Filed Under: Divorce, Heather, John · Tagged: , , , , , , , ,
Feb 19, 2012

See, she can match

By · Leave a Comment

Tesla dressed herself today.  At almost 6 years old, she has no problem dressing herself.

I’ve been accused of letting my daughter dress in clothes that don’t match, that are too big, and are boys clothes.

For the record, it’s not me.  She picks her own clothes out.

And today, she wanted her clothes to match.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

~P.

Filed Under: Tesla · Tagged: , ,
Feb 19, 2012

Looner Questionnaire

By · 23 Comments

Static electricity is free!

I’ve compiled a two page questionnaire.  Anyone who has a balloon fetish is welcome to copy and paste this to a word document and email it to me at pcrider@ycp.edu.  write Looner in the subject line.

You may use an alias if you wish, but I will not be revealing anyone’s name.

Thank you!

~P.

Looners Interview:  Thank you for answering my questions about the sexual fetish involving balloons.  Please answer all questions that you are comfortable sharing.

Name or Alias:

Gender:

Age:

Occupation:

What age did you find you liked balloons?

At what age did balloons become a part of sex for you?

Is this fetish shared with your significant other? (boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband)

Why or why not?

Do you reveal your fetish to family?  Friends?

What about balloons do you find appealing?

How do you involve balloons in a sexual experience?

Do you find other objects that can hold air stimulating? (latex gloves, condoms, etc.)

Are you sexually stimulated just by the sight of balloons? (at a traditional party)

Does size, shape or color of the balloon make a difference?

Are helium balloons more attractive/stimulating than regular blown balloons?

If a balloon has a balloon inside, is that extra stimulating?

Do you prefer blowing up balloons or inflating with helium?

Do you ever fill balloons with something other than air? (water, sand, mayonnaise, pickle juice)

Are the silver (foil) balloons appealing?

Do you have a specific balloon memory from childhood?  Good or bad?

Do you like to pop balloons?

Do you get attached to the balloons and hate when they pop?

Do you have a favorite looner moment?

In your opinion is there any harm in a balloon fetish?  (Physically, psychologically, etc.)

What do you believe other people think of Looners?

Does being a Looner have any effect on your relationships with others?

What do you find to be the most enjoyable activity with a balloon? (smell, feel, static, popping sound, etc.)

Any other comments please write as much as you would like.

Thank you!

Pattie Crider

York College of PA

Filed Under: Balloons, College, Professional Writing Class · Tagged: , , ,
Feb 19, 2012

Jellybeans and Divorce

By · Leave a Comment

Friday was a great day.  After my day on campus ended I drove to Windsor.  A brief stop to sign Tesla’s release papers and I was on my way to her school.

In Ms. Dettinger’s class we first worked on their journals.  I get a kick out of the students writing in their journals.  They come up with very creative sentences.

After journals, they worked on filling out graphs. Ms. Dettinger’s graphs were illustrated with Hershey Kisses, gum drops and jellybeans.  She made this more exciting by having real candy to fill the squares of the graph accordingly.  This type of learning the kids really were into: 4 Hershey Kisses, 6 jellybeans and 3 gumdrops.  Tesla shared hers with me!

Last night after her and I cleaned up from playing with playdoh, I posted pictures of two “doh sculptures.”  Tesla asked to watch the video of her stuffing speghetti into her mouth.  She recognized the island as the one in John and my house.

Tesla said, “I want you to live in the house with Daddy.” and I replied, “I did live there with your Daddy but not anymore.’

“Why?” she asked and I said, “We aren’t in love anymore, but we love you.”

This morning I woke up from a dream:

John and I had been arguing over many jellybeans were in our house.

Dreams are weird,

~P.

Filed Under: Divorce, Dreams, John · Tagged: , , , , ,
Feb 19, 2012

Squids n spiders

By · Leave a Comment

What Tesla and I did.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Black Squid
Spectacular Spider

Filed Under: Art, Tesla · Tagged: , ,
Feb 19, 2012

The beauty of the internet

By · Leave a Comment

People have different opinions of the internet.  Some hate it and would declare it the ruin of civilization.  Others wouldn’t know what to do with themselves if they didn’t have the internet.

 

I lived my entire childhood with out a computer in the house.  I lived many years without cable or even just local stations.  I survived and so did my sons, Jarrid and Zeth.

 

The internet connects people all over the world.  People from years and years ago pop up and say “hello old friend.”  Sometimes that is a good thing, other times, not so much. 

What I find to be super satisfying is meeting new people. 

That is the beauty of the internet!

~P.

 

 

Filed Under: Just Life · Tagged:
Feb 17, 2012

The Agreements

By · 3 Comments

The Agreements

If I wanted to visit with Tesla, I had to sign. My six short visits.

Sigh,
~P.

Filed Under: John, Tesla · Tagged: , ,
Feb 16, 2012

The Most Epic Fancy Friday Ever

By · 1 Comment

By: Thomas E. Delphi  York College of PA

Attention! FANCY FRIDAY WILL GO GLOBAL!
I want to invite people from every continent on the face of the planet! THE FANCY UPRISING HAS BEGUN, HEIL DRESS PAN-… Ahem…allow me to explain.
Fancy Friday is a small holliday started in York College of Pennsylvania. Every F…riday, particpants, men and women both young and old, will elect to dress well for the day, changing polos and t-shirts for suits and dresses, dress shoes and heels. Casual Wear, barring work requirements, is considered unacceptible. If you DON’T like the idea of Fancy Friday, that’s fine, you don’t need to participate.
If you like the idea, act and dress well on March 9th and perform the following:
On Friday, March 9th, I would like at least one participant from each of the following regions of the Planet: East Asia (China, Japan, Korea), West Asia (The Middle East), South Asia (India to Iran), South East Asia (Vietnam to the Phillipines), Central Asia (Kazakhstan!), North Asia (East Russia), North Africa, Central Africa, South Africa, West Europe, East Europe, Scandinavia, Russia, South America, Central America & the Carribean, North America and Oceana.
I would like everyone who participates around the world to post a picture of themselves in their Fancy Friday attire onto Facebook. As such, I would hope everyone I invite to participate will pass on the invitation to their friends and post this event to their Facebook feed.
Stay classy kids and lets make this happen!
Filed Under: classmates, College · Tagged: , , ,
Feb 16, 2012

Who is smart?!

By · 1 Comment

John doesn’t read email and Heather doesn’t know how to open email. (yeah ok)  I would have believed it if she said “I can’t spell.”

 

LaDonna is on her honeymoon and John had to work today.  I’m surprised the world didn’t end….  Yes, John worked on a job!  Maybe he short on employees…I hope the job went better than some of the more recent ones.

 

Maybe my son is smarter than me, as John said to my face tonight.  Jarrid realized what a piece of —- John was way before I did.

Really, for not reading my blog or his emails, John sure knows what’s going on in my life.  John is just as obsessed with me now as the day he met me.  Sorry it didn’t work out.  Actually, I’m not sorry.  Thank God I got away.

Furthermore,  it’s sad that Tesla has to ride home in a work truck (must smell like stinky men) just because her dad has control issues and won’t let her ride with her cousin, Blaine and me.  Blaine and Tesla were in different gymnastic classes so they didn’t even get to talk.  The ride to back to her dad’s would have given them 10-15 minutes to chat.  But, no.  Daddy can’t let Tesla talk to her family.

 

Even though Tesla was in tears because she couldn’t ride with her mom, John didn’t care.  Of course he will blame it on me, saying I upset Tesla.  The child misses her mother but obviously her father and his current girlfriend don’t care.  Heather, you make me laugh when you tell people there is never a dull moment.  No shit, you signed up for it.  I almost can’t wait for your divorce and my divorce to go through.  Why?  Too see if the two of you actually get married.  Baaahaaaaahaaaaaa!  You know he is all yours!  I bet Dale and I marry before the two of you, because Dale is SINGLE and waiting to marry me!

 

Oh….I will never sign a divorce agreement that doesn’t completely remove my name from every document that currently holds John and I together.  So NO Heather, I won’t be signing off my house to you.  I realize that is your goal.

There should be NO reason Tesla can not go home with me right after school on Friday.  I will be at the school volunteering and Eastern has an dismissal making it much easier for her and I to be on our way after the school day.

Bullshit as usual,

~P.

Filed Under: Divorce, Heather, John · Tagged: , , ,
Feb 15, 2012

Definition of Looner

By · Leave a Comment

Now that is a big balloon!

What is a “looner?”

That’s what I will be researching!

Wikipedia’s definition:

A balloon fetish is a sexual fetish that involves balloons. A balloon fetishist is also referred to as a “looner.” Some balloon fetishists “revel in the popping of balloons and [others] may become anxious and tearful at the very thought of popping balloons”. Others enjoy blowing up balloons or sitting and lying on them.

 

Very interesting topic to research.  Keep an eye out for posting as I do my research.

If you are a Looner and would like to be interviewed please email me at pcrider@ycp.edu.  Put Looner in the subject line of the email.

Thank you!

~Pattie

Filed Under: Balloons, College, Professional Writing Class · Tagged: , ,
«Previous Page
Next Page»