Ying woke

Ying woke early Saturday morning, stretching his long furry legs on the luxurious king size memory foam mattress fitted with six hundred thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, a silky comforter embellished with beautiful geometric shapes in various sizes, sixteen pillows matching the comforter’s pattern and colors all situated on an expensive handmade dark mahogany four poster bed passed down through eight generations of his owner’s family-German in descent-and shoved his cold nose into her hand, eager to get their morning routine started.

“It’s Saturday mutt!  Get away!” she yelled.

(Assignment was to write one sentence of at least 75 words followed by a short sentence)

Rat in bed

Don’t move

You don’t get to have the beginning of the day feeling more than once.

Unless you just got up from a nap.  Oh wait, that counts….for dumbasses.

 

The sleepy bathroom walk, in the dark with only one eye kind-of focused.

Take my seat, praying it is there and I don’t plunge into the chilly toitie water.

I rest my head on my hands and began to pee, drifting into the first stage of sleep easily.

Head becomes heavy and my arms join in…R.E.M. sleep is calling me.  A tilt forward toward the linen closet door and I jerked back slightly, realizing my head was in immediate danger.  Finished up with the usual tp routine and walked back to bed.

Noting the rat curled up at the foot of my bed, I crawled back in and added an additional 1.5 hours to my sleep time.

Now that counts.

~P.

 

Damn tan lines

Sweater season is over!!

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Kid, cat and a chainsaw

Blaine & Emily

This is a cute picture of Blaine looking out the sliding glass door at my cat Emily.  Blaine was just three years old I believe.  He thought Emily was so pretty.  I don’t know where Emily is anymore.  John called the SPCA to come take her  and Tesla’s cat Sparky, away.  He claimed they were strays.  Disposable cats, just like dogs in John’s world.

Later that day, John took Blaine outside with him.  John decide to trim the sumac trees.  He accidentally bumped Blaine in the back of the head with the chainsaw.

Thank God it was not engaged.

Blaine will forever be missing hair and have a scar where Uncle John almost cut off his head.

~P.

 

Dear Campus Safety

Security?

Dear Officers,

Today I received a phone call concerning my dog Ying.  I called the York College campus officer back and was told there were complaints about my dog staying in my car while I am in class.  Hmmm.

Yesterday, while my boyfriend and I were in the Humanities building passing time until 8 PM, I could hear two kids running in the halls and laughing.  I looked out the door of the Professional Writing Studio and as the kids ran by one  a jaw breaker inside, hitting Dale in the head.  They kept going and when they looped around the older boy threw another jaw breaker and hit Dale a second time.  I was furious.

I followed the boys and they ran out of the building.  I picked up the phone right inside the double doors to call campus security but there was no number listed by the phone to contact them.  I went back to the studio and used my cell phone (number is in my contacts) and reached an answering machine.  Now I was really pissed!  I went in the learning center and asked someone to look up the emergency number of campus security.  I then called and let the emergency operator know about these two boys.

About 5-8 minutes later, I walk outside and the same two boys are taking ice out of the Gatorade containers behind Humanities and throwing it at cars and people.  When I yelled at them, the older boy started throwing the ice at me, running around in circles, and laughing.  I think it’s possible he may have been on something by the way he was acting.  I went back inside and called the emergency number again.  Meanwhile, the boys jumped into the stream and ran through the properties on the other side.

Oh, campus security did eventually arrive.  Of course they missed everything even though at least 15 minutes had passed with these boys raising hell.  Maybe if they gave more attention to the actual problems on campus they wouldn’t have the free time to bitch about my dog in the car.  I’m told people are complaining about Ying.  Complaining how?  He is fed, has water, gets exercised between classes, and cannot hurt anyone walking past my car.  Why is it a problem on campus?

Here are some problems that should be addressed.

  1.  The phone number for campus safety and emergency should be posted by every phone on campus.
  2. The response time to a call needs to greatly improve.
  3. The removal of people trespassing on campus needs to be taken seriously.  So far I’ve seen at least one trespasser confront a student in the parking lot with the intention of taking her personal property.
  4. Any kids on campus that are clearly too young to be students should be questioned why they are there.  I don’t know if the boys from last night were children of a professor, staff etc., but their behavior was disruptive and possibly dangerous to others as well as themselves.  What if they had entered the building with guns or knives instead of jaw breakers, and Runts candies?  What if they had been throwing rocks instead of ice?

My dog isn’t hurting anyone.  If people are complaining, I would love to know why.  Mr. Security Officer didn’t have an answer to why people were complaining, just that my dog can’t hang out in my car.  Sounds like a bunch of dog shit to me.  How about security officers focus on the underage drinking, drug use, non-permit parked cars and trespassers on campus?

I can’t say campus security makes me feel any safer.  Can you?

~P.

There is a dog in the hall

My day went rather well.  Nothing earth-shaking happened and I appreciate the occasional, uneventful day.

First off was Spanish II and we had to do oral presentations.   I spoke as “Maria Gonzalez” about my visit to Cancun.  I  told them about the Mayan ruins, the beautiful beaches, and shopping for hand-made goods.  I took an empty bottle of Kahlua that was shaped like the Aztec architecture in that region, two hand-beaded necklaces, a woven purse, a painted clay dish and the tickets I had for entering the ruins at the city Chichen Itza.  I managed to speak my new name, where I went, what I wore,  what I did, bought, liked…etc.  I earned an 82% and that made me happy.

Second was Document Design class but we had a speaker instead.  She talked about internships, resumes, cover letters…blah blah.  I did my homework for Human Communications during her presentation.  Occasionally I would look up, nod my head and even make a relevent comment.  Other than that, I was absorbed in HumCom and finished the paper before she was even done her speech.

Last class was Writing 202 and we were discussing our topics for research.  My professor asked what my topic was and I said dogs.  I deliberately gave a super broad topic and waited for her to say, “And what about dogs?” to nudge me on with my specifics.

“I want to research skin care for hairless breeds of dogs.  Due to this breed of dog’s extreme tendency to have acne-ridden, dry, skin I hope to find the best way to care for my dog.”

“I see,’ Nancy answered.  “Your dog doesn’t have hair?” she asked.

“Not really,” I answered.

Jumping into the conversation someone yelled out, “Can she bring him in the day she presents?

That’s not really a cool idea.  If I’m giving a presentation, the last thing I want to worry about is Ying peeing on the floor while I talk! 

Actually, he is in my car right now, I’ll go get him,”  I offered.

I ran out to my car and put Ying on the leash.  We walked down the hallway like we owned the place.  My classmates thought Ying was so cute and so well-behaved.  He walked around the room saying hi to everyone, then curled up at my feet.  At least he behaves in front of crowds.  My example of summarizing a chapter of a story earned me 47/50.  Happy with that too!

Class was over and we beat feet and paws off campus.

Me and Ying…..out.

~P.

 

 

 

Amanta, Pattie Cakes and TT

Who is your best friend Tesla?

You mom!

Awwwww…..who is your second best friend?

Ying!

Laughing…who is your third best friend?

Amanta!

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Amanda Hoke is the smartest 3-year-old I know.  She calls me Pattie Cakes which I find adorable.

She knows more dinosaur names than I will ever learn.

~P.

2012 vomit, bird beaks and a fedora

The new year didn’t start out so great.  I was up at 8 AM, waking my little ball of sunshine up so she would be ready when her father arrived at 9 to get her.  While she got dressed, I walked Ying.

Ying and I hadn’t been outside long when my stomach began rumbling and my mouth began to water.  I recognized those warning signs but it was too late to go back in the house.  Linda Blair style, I began puking in the front yard.  My eyes watered and stomach heaved uncontrollably.  If I hadn’t went to the bathroom before taking Ying out I would have wet my pants.   Now I would have been cursing myself for drinking too much on New Years Eve, had I even had one drink!  After the wave of nausea passed I sheepishly looked around to see if there were any witness. (no, my head did not spin around)   I didn’t see any sign of my neighbors being nosey so I guess Ying was my only witness.

Tesla was dressed when I came back in.  We snuggled on the couch until her dad showed up.  After a week together,  it was hard to see her leave.  She didn’t get upset or argue with me about going with her dad.  I think she was still half asleep.  I saw John pull up so I said my goodbyes and gave hugs and kisses to Tesla before I opened the door for her.

As soon as she went out I said “I love you baby!” and closed the door.  The less I have to look at John, with his bird beak nose, wanna be beard and goofy fedora, the better.  I found this man attractive at one time?  Love is blind.

I am actually psyched about 2012.  The Mayan calendar (which is very accurate) predicts the end of the world as we know it to be December 21, 2012.  That might freak some people out, but I am fine with that being my last day on earth.  What could happen that day that will change the world as we know it?  Hard to say, other than it won’t be a flood.  🙂

God Bless everyone with the start of this new year.  Times are difficult, the economy sucks and no one should take things granted.   Enjoy everyday with the people you love…there may be less than a year left on earth.  Tell your friends and family you love them because everyday is precious.

Love you!!

~P.

Ying is ready

I can hear him jingle when he tries to sneak away

Ying is ready for Christmas.

I’m almost ready.  Going for a couple little things tonight.

I hear Jingle Bells!

Dear Ying

You are a rat

Dear Ying,

I realized you’re not going to care if I call you a rat.  You’re a dog, that catches rats, for Chinese royalty.  It must have made it easier for your past generations, to blend in with what they seek to kill.  Lucky for you Yinger, my Ying-a-Ding, you don’t have to chase rats for a living.

It’s a pretty comfy life for you at my house.  Ya know it cost me an extra $250 deposit, plus an additional $35 a month for you to live here?  Could you show a little appreciation please?  Stop trying to sneak out and make ugly puppies in Shiloh!  My luck, you’ll get some collie dog pregnant and scare the owners half to death at delivery time.

Back to showing appreciation to me, your master.  Get that?  I’m the master, you’re the dog.  Do not jump on the counter and help yourself to anything.  There are many things I want covered by that word anything, such as: crayons, ears of fresh corn, entire plate of brownies with fudge topping.  Stop eating OUR food and being so sneaky about it.  No one BUT you would eat an entire plate of brownies at once, though I’ve thought about it.

Well, you are looking at me while I type so I guess you want something.  You gotta go out to pee?  Want to get your rawhide in the basement?  Need water?  Well tough shit, I have a couple more things to do first.

Like edit before publishing.

You are a bad rat.  You poop with colorful crayon bits in your dookie.  Gross!  You ate an ear of corn and most of the cob, then yacked it up all over the floor.   Remember that day? http://girlboxer1970.com/2011/07/28/off-to-class/  I was late for class.  So Friday, Tesla and I make brownies and what do you do?  Eat all of it, right out of the pan, later that day.

The one brownie I did get to eat

All this is just bad behavior Yinger.  You cost me too much, and I do love you to little pieces, but the bullshits got to stop.

Ok, let’s go outside now,

~P.