Communication Test

Can you hear me now?

How Pattie studies for Human Communication Test

Verbal Communication is: words (spoken, written or coded) in an attempt to communicate with others.

Some people just fucking suck at this.

Power in Communication is: the ability to influence or control the behaviors of another person.

Some people should never have power.

Legitimate power-when people believe you have a right-by virtue of your position-to influence or control others’ behaviors.  Examples of this power: employer, judge, manager or police officer.

It goes to their head.

Referent power-when others wish to be like you.  (a younger brother looking up to an older brother)

I looked up to my mother.

Reward power-when a person controls the rewards others want. Examples would be: money, promotion, jewelry, love, friendship, respect…

I know someone who likes to control the rewards.

Coercive power– when you have the ability to administer punishment to or remove rewards from others if they do not do as you wish.  Usually this power is in conjunction with Reward power.  Examples would be teachers, supervisors, spouses.

Way too many assholes have this type of power.

Expert power– when you have expertise knowledge on a subject.

More of this power is needed.

Information power (also called “persuasion power”)-when others see you as having the ability to communicate logically and persuasively.

I know some seriously persuasive people, one impeticular.

Power is not static; it can be increased or decreased depending on what someone does and doesn’t do.

I am learning how the written word can be used to communicate intimately and publicly.  Lol  The pen is mightier than the sword…

You can decrease or lose power.  The most common way to lose power is by unsuccessfully trying to control another’s behavior.  Example:  If you threaten to do something then fail to carry out your threat, most likely, you will lose power.

Threatened with divorce…where the hell is it?

You can lose power by allowing other to control you or take unfair advantage of you.  When you don’t confront these power tactics, you lose power.

I remember feeling that way.  I no longer feel that way because I’ve taken my power back!  Amazing what the power of knowledge is and how it makes you feel about yourself. 

Next chapter please,


Oh btw….The sentences in italics are my own thoughts, everything else is right out of Essentials of Human Communication by Joseph A. DeVito

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I miss her smile

I can’t describe the pain I feel with a week passing by and not seeing my daughter.  Making it even more painful is the fact that any day over the past week, I could have seen her.

I miss her silly smile, her songs and storys.  She likes to make up a story and really get me going then say “I’m only kidding!” which is cute right?!  Well, not so much the other night when she told me Bria bit her.  She went on and on about it then suddenly said she was kidding.  Was she kidding?  I really don’t know.

This afternoon on the phone, Tesla told me I could come get her tomorrow and we would make cupcakes at the house.  I said “Really? Your dad said that?” and she replied, “No, Heather did.”  Instantly in the background I could hear Heather saying, “I didn’t say that Tesla.”  That glimmer of hope was quickly extinquished.

Imagine your child, at the age of 5 asking when she can come home again and you have to tell her it will be another week.  I did reassure her that I will see her tomorrow at dance class and that seemed to soothe her.  Without even seeing her in person or talking to her privately, I can tell she knows what’s holding her back from seeing her mother.  Everyone can see it but that person themself.

She told me she missed me.  I told her I missed her.  We sang four songs and I told her to call me before bed.

She never called.


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